The Burning Flame
The Summer Olympics are back this year. My family loves watching the Olympics. My wife was a collegiate swimmer, so she got all of us into watching swimming. That has bled over into us getting into all of the other competitions. We watch pretty much everything.
One of the most iconic parts of the Olympic games is the lighting of the Olympic flame. This is supposed to symbolize the continuity between the ancient games and the modern games. Several months before the competition, the torch is lit in Olympia, Greece. It travels to the destination of the Olympics through a series of relays and handoffs. During the opening ceremony, the official Olympic cauldron is lit by the torch and it remains burning throughout the course of the games.
I think of this whenever I read through the book of James. In James chapter 3, we’re told that our tongues are like a lit torch. In verse 6, James says something shocking. He says that our tongues are a fire lit by hell itself:
And the tongue is a fire, a world of unrighteousness. The tongue is set among our members, staining the whole body, setting on fire the entire course of life, and set on fire by hell.
Imagine a relay of someone lighting a fire in the flames of hell and taking that all the way to your mouth to ignite your tongue. James’ point in James 3 is that our tongues have tremendous power, like that of a raging fire. When used sinfully, our tongues can inflict great damage—like the fires of hell burning in destruction.
Conversely, in Proverbs 16:24, we’re told this:
Gracious words are like a honeycomb, sweetness to the soul and health to the body.
Gracious words can give comfort and build someone up.
The Impact of Our Words on Our Marriages
Our speech has a massive impact on our families. Our words can be used for great evil or great good in our marriages. Times of conflict between a husband and wife are like standing on a powder keg. When husbands and wives are not aligned, those are often times when emotions can run high. Disagreements can escalate into arguments at the drop of a hat. How we communicate during conflicts can mean the difference between igniting that powder keg with the fires of Hell or diffusing it with the cooling words of Heaven. Married couples should seek to honor God in how they communicate, even during conflicts.
The Power of Our Words
Finish this sentence: “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but…“
“Words may never hurt me.” We say that as kids, but that’s definitely not true. Words can hurt us a great deal. I can think of hurtful comments that someone said to me twenty years ago that still sting when they pop up in my mind from time to time. The Bible is very clear on this point: our words matter.
Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruits.
Prov 18:21
Our words can mean the difference between death and life. Our tongues are that powerful.
We mentioned James 2 in the introduction, but let’s revisit this passage to see the power of the tongue.
For we all stumble in many ways. And if anyone does not stumble in what he says, he is a perfect man, able also to bridle his whole body… So also the tongue is a small member, yet it boasts of great things. How great a forest is set ablaze by such a small fire! And the tongue is a fire, a world of unrighteousness. The tongue is set among our members, staining the whole body, setting on fire the entire course of life, and set on fire by hell.
James 3:2; 5-6
James tells us that even though our tongues are so small, they can do a world of damage. He compares it to the destructive fire that can burn down a whole forest.
In California, we’re no strangers to the destructive power of fire. Over the past few years, we’ve seen multiple state emergencies when massive fires were burning out of control. My family was under evacuation warning for over a week in 2020 due to the SCU Complex fire that was started by dry lightning strikes. That fire lasted for 44 days and destroyed almost 400K acres. When speaking unrighteously, our tongues have that same destructive effect. James says the devastation caused by unrighteous words are fueled by the fires of Hell. As believers with redeemed hearts, we should not be speaking the words of Satan, especially to our spouses.
We need to realize that our words matter and have tremendous power to either strengthen or damage our marriages. In a series of upcoming articles, we’ll look at foolish ways we often communicate in times of conflict, as well as wise ways we should be communicating instead.
